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Mother's Myth?  By Coaching Circles Staff Writer
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My mother loves to tell the story of the day she met my father and just "knew." They were in college. He walked in late to a Shakespeare studies class. He was wielding a cane due to some sort of football injury. (Yes, my Dad was a stud.) According to my mother, she turned around to her best friend and whispered, "THAT is the man I'm going to marry." Her friend whispered back, "But Ann, you don't even know his name." My mother, clear eyed and momentarily psychic, replied "No, but I will find it out."

Now according to my father, he avoided sitting near my mother that day since she seemed like a snob. He already had three girlfriends anyway. He was focused on finding a seat, dealing with his cane, and getting out his notebook. Meanwhile, three rows to his left, a snobby southern belle was plotting to change his life forever.

It took six months for my Dad to ask my mother out on a date. Her vision, however, had not faded. They went on a picnic in the mountains. As they were searching for the perfect spot, she asked him to tell her some of the names in his family. He thought this game seemed innocent enough so he played along, reciting his ancestor's names with the cadence of a poet. When what would become my first name rolled off his tongue, my mother had another psychic flash. She turned to him and said, "Coleman...THAT is what we'll name our first child." He swerved off the road. Two years later they eloped. But that's another story.

Growing up hearing Mom's legend of love at first sight, filled me with fairy tale expectations. Though my own love life has been a different journey, I still hold out for that moment of soul mate recognition that my mother experienced. After all, "Honey, you'll just know," is a promise my mother made to me long ago.
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CELEBRITY INTERVIEW
with ROSE McGOWAN by Coaching Circles Staff Writer
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ROSE McGOWAN is one of the most sought-after actresses in Hollywood. Raised in a commune in Italy for the Children of God cult, McGowan's life has always been anything but ordinary. Her film roles, as well as her engagement to shock rocker Marilyn Manson (aka Brian Warner) continue to fascinate the public. But the star of "Jawbreaker," "Ready to Rumble" and the upcoming Brendan Fraser, Bridget Fonda, Whoopi Goldberg comedy, "Monkeybone," has some simple advice on how she keeps things rockin' with Manson. CC: How do you and Marilyn keep your relationship fresh?

Rose: We go away alone together for the weekend every three months. Last time we went miniature golfing and rode little race cars and smashed them into each other. It was Golf & Stuff up near Santa Barbara. We couldn’t go outside the car much because we’re too noticeable, but it was a nice drive up the coast." CC: What relationship advice would you give other women?

Rose: Ladies, don't hang your bras and undergarments around in the bathroom. You've got to keep the mystery alive. Those items should just naturally appear when the mood is right.

CC: How did you know Marilyn was the one?

Rose: He's devastatingly funny--and whip smart. I can't even tell you most of the stuff he does to make me laugh. It's not printable. But when you're that intimate with someone, you should feel comfortable doing things you wouldn't normally do in front of others. We certainly do.
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“Ten Important Research Findings on Marriage and Choosing a Marriage Partner” by David Popenoe and Barbara Dafoe Whitehead
From the National Marriage Project’s Ten Things to Know Series  free
“Nine Psychological Tasks for a Good Marriage” by APA
Research on what makes a marriage work shows that people in a good marriage have completed these psychological "tasks": free
“~ Hawaiian song” anonymous

Here all seeking is over,
the lost has been found,
a mate has been found
to share the chills of winter
now Love asks
that you be united.
Here is a place to rest,
a place to sleep,
a place in heaven.
Now two are becoming one,
the black night is scattered,
the eastern sky grows bright.
At last the great day has come. free

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